Discover your attachment style, and get advice from a couple’s therapist on what to do once you know yours.
As you answer, think about your current or most recent romantic relationship.
Attachment theory was created in the late 1950s by psychologists John Bowlby and Mary Ainsworth.
According to attachment theory, the relationships you had in childhood with your parents or primary caregivers can shape the way you navigate romantic relationships as an adult. It specifically looks at the way your caregivers would respond or not to your needs, teaching you how to get your needs met.
Knowing your attachment style can help you understand your romantic relationships, make sense of any problematic patterns, and recognize how they’re affecting your love life.
What are the 4 types of attachment styles?
The four attachment styles are:
What is the most problematic attachment style?
Although most people would agree that a secure attachment style is the healthiest, Seeger DeGeare adds that attachment styles aren’t something to be looked at as “good” or “bad”. Try to not get too attached (pun intended) to the idea that attachment styles are the be-all and end-all of a healthy relationship. Instead, learn what your attachment style is and use it as a way to learn more about yourself, and grow as a partner.
What is the rarest type of attachment?
There isn’t a consensus on this, but most research suggests the most common form of attachment style is secure, followed by avoidant and anxious. Disorganized attachment seems to be the least common type of attachment style.